Give A Gift
Displaying all articles tagged:

Ask Polly

  1. ask polly
    Good-bye, New YorkI’m headed to Substack and expanding Ask Polly to find new ways to help readers cultivate compassion and joy. Come with me!
    By Heather Havrilesky
  2. ask polly
    ‘My Boyfriend Refuses to Change’Do you want a real partner, or someone to admire from afar?
    By Heather Havrilesky
  3. ask polly
    ‘I Feel Like My Rage Might Eat Me Alive’You’re sad and lonely and you need to start asking for the love and support you deserve.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  4. ask polly
    ‘I’m Not Ready for Isolation to End!’Instead of blaming yourself for where you are, accept yourself and stand up for your preferences.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  5. ask polly
    ‘My Dad Died, and Now I’m Worried I’m Headed for Divorce’You’re using your anger at your husband as a distraction to keep from facing this enormous loss.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  6. ask polly
    ‘I’m Too Old and Washed Up to Succeed!’You need to rid yourself of negative delusions and build a more resilient vision of your future.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  7. ask polly
    ‘Should I Leave My Good Job to Pursue My Artistic Dreams?’Stop surrendering to your worries and learn to enjoy the risks and adventure of a creative career.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  8. ask polly
    ‘I Only Want to Date Men Who’ve Been Through Therapy!’What you’re looking for is someone who’s curious and open to learning new things.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  9. ask polly
    ‘I Want My Family to Love Me Unconditionally’The cause of your sadness isn’t the same as the solution.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  10. ask polly
    ‘My Husband Won’t Have Sex With Me!’Your bedroom has become a battleground where all of your fears and anxieties go head-to-head.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  11. ask polly
    My Friend Group Dumped Me and Now I Have No One!It’s time to stop trying to please people and start being your true self.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  12. ask polly
    ‘Do I Have to Thank My Weird Aunt for Her Terrible Gifts?’Even though her inability to hear you is triggering, consider the big picture and choose your battles carefully.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  13. ask polly
    ‘Everything I Do Fails, So I Don’t Even Try’You keep yourself safe from investing in the world because you don’t want to be disappointed.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  14. ask polly
    ‘People Tell Me I Seem Like a Snob Whenever I’m Quiet!’Confident, self-possessed women often make people nervous.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  15. ask polly
    ‘Why Can’t I Stop Lying All the Time?’You’re struggling with avoidance, anxiety, and shame.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  16. ask polly
    ‘How Do I Live Like an Artist?’Stop battling yourself and embrace the truth, no matter how ugly.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  17. ask polly
    ‘I’m Freezing My Eggs and It’s Kicked Up So Much Rage!’Throw away this complicated puzzle and reconnect with the people around you.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  18. ask polly
    ‘Why Do Other People’s Interests Make Me So Insecure?’Strong reactions sometimes hint at long-buried desires that need to be addressed.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  19. ask polly
    ‘I’m Miserable and I’m Taking It Out on My Husband’You can’t build a stronger connection when you’re committed to chaos.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  20. ask polly
    ‘Most of My Friendships Were Toxic, But Now I’m So Lonely!’Until you learn to assert healthy boundaries, you’ll struggle with all of your relationships.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  21. ask polly
    ‘I’ve Made So Many Mistakes and I’m Way Behind in Life’You have to learn to get beyond guilt and shame.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  22. ask polly
    ‘My Limited Experience With Love Has Been Totally Humiliating’When situations are murky and confusing, it’s often women who soak up all the shame.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  23. ask polly
    ‘Help, My Pandemic Crush Feels So Real!’The key is to tap into desire and imagination without always attaching it to this particular man.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  24. ask polly
    ‘How Can I Feel Confident While I’m Going Through Chemo?’When you let the truly difficult parts of life come at you full force, it can transform you.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  25. ask polly
    ‘My Future In-Laws Are Assholes!’Stop judging and take the risk of trying to understand them.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  26. ask polly
    ‘I Feel Ashamed of Almost Everything’You need to learn how to be who you already are.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  27. ask polly
    ‘Is an Open Relationship With My Ex a Bad Idea?’You have to trust your gut.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  28. ask polly
    ‘My Boyfriend Bugs the Hell Out of Me!’It’s time to step away from fear and shame.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  29. ask polly
    ‘I’m Sure My Boyfriend Is Secretly in Love With His Co-worker’It sounds like you’re the one who’s obsessed with this woman.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  30. ask polly
    ‘My Ex Keeps Emailing Me and I Hate It!’Ask yourself why you’re unsettled by his affection.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  31. ask polly
    ‘Why Do My Friendships Always Fade Away?’You have to learn to ask your friends for what you want from them.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  32. ask polly
    ‘I Feel Ugly and Lonely and I Don’t Know How to Change’It’s time to abandon your old tricks and feel your way forward.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  33. ask polly
    ‘Is This the Worst Possible Time to Break Up With Someone?’Now is the time to shower the people around you with compassion.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  34. ask polly
    ‘I Don’t Think I Can Handle 18 Months of Isolation’Resolve not to fixate on the millions of terrifying possibilities you cannot control.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  35. ask polly
    ‘Is My Sexy Poet Friend Manipulating Me?’You need to spend some time thinking about the value of boundaries.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  36. ask polly
    ‘I’m Trans and I Feel Unlovable’Stop retelling other people’s bad stories and write your own instead.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  37. ask polly
    ‘My Dream Man Moved On. Should I Wait For Him?’You need to start loosening your grip on this obsession.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  38. ask polly
    ‘I Can’t Get Over My Married Lover!’Look around and ask yourself what this guy had that you wanted.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  39. ask polly
    ‘I Want to Dump My Beautiful, Loving Girlfriend’It’s not selfish to pay attention to your desires.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  40. ask polly
    ‘No One at Work Respects Me!’Shift your energy from fixing to observing.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  41. ask polly
    ‘I Moved Off-Grid With an Emotionally Stunted Older Man!’You need to spend some more time getting to know yourself.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  42. ask polly
    ‘I Have Everything, But I’m Still Sad and Angry’Stop stigmatizing your restless desires.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  43. ask polly
    ‘I Don’t Know How to Feel My Desire’You have to learn to face your shame and sit with it.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  44. ask polly
    ‘My Life Is Pathetic!’Life doesn’t become easy and stay that way.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  45. ask polly
    ‘I’ve Lost My Joy and I Want It Back!’Give yourself room to breathe and be alive and wild.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  46. ask polly
    ‘I’m Addicted to Rejection’Find the people who can see your rays of light.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  47. ask polly
    ‘I’m Trying to Go Gray and I Hate It!’Listen to what you’re feeling.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  48. ask polly
    ‘I’ve Never Had Sex, and I Feel Like I Never Will’You need to tune in to how much control you have.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  49. ask polly
    ‘I’m Defective as a Human Being!’It’s impossible to “fix” anything if you don’t have compassion for yourself.
    By Heather Havrilesky
  50. ask polly
    ‘I Give Up!’Finding your power takes more than completing the assignment as directed.
    By Heather Havrilesky
Load More