Give A Gift
Displaying all articles tagged:

Can U Not

  1. can u not
    Citadel Cadets Suspended After Wearing White Pillowcases on HeadsThe students at the military college said they were performing a “Ghosts of Christmas Past” sketch.
    By Jaime Fuller
  2. department of bad ideas
    Gun-Rights Groups Staging Fake Mass ShootingThey are also going to march around with loaded guns. 
    By Jaime Fuller and Margaret Hartmann
  3. can u not
    Not Content With Already Having It All, Man Claims ‘Period Pain’ for HimselfIs nothing sacred?
    By Jessica Roy
  4. can u not
    Don’t Use Rape to Advertise Your Black Friday SaleTerrible idea.
    By Jessica Roy
  5. bad ideas
    Canadian Man Faces Jail Time for Smuggling Turtles in His PantsHe strapped 41 turtles around his legs and hid 10 in between.
    By Elaine Godfrey
  6. can u not
    Thai Printer Decides Not to Publish Front-Page Story About How Economy StinksIt’s not like anyone will notice that there is a huge blank space in the middle of the page, right?
    By Jaime Fuller
  7. can u not
    Vogue Really Wants to Ruin Thanksgiving DinnerSo does PopSugar, Time, and The Weather Channel.
    By Susan Rinkunas
  8. oops
    Drunk Russian Sailor Crashes Massive Cargo Ship at Full Speed The 7,000-ton ship was so badly damaged it had to be scrapped. 
    By Nathan Pemberton
  9. can u not
    Alright, Who’s Going to Tell the Men They’re Wrong About ‘Man Periods’?It’s gonna have to be me, isn’t it.
    By Jessica Roy
  10. can u not
    Oxford Dictionaries’ Word of the Year Isn’t Even a Word, It’s an EmojiWhat’s the emoji for “embarrassing bid for relevancy”?
    By Jessica Roy
  11. can u not
    Man Demands Refund for $5 Coffee After Woman Turns Down Second DateClassy move.
    By Jessica Roy
  12. can u not
    Aircraft-Annoying Lasers Now Taking Over Skies in BrooklynHow many helicopters does it take to find a laser pointer?
    By Elaine Godfrey
  13. can u not
    Why Is This Random European Dude Talking to Me at 7 a.m.?Make him stop.
    By Jessica Roy
  14. can u not
    Does Anyone Know How to Return This Gift I Got From God?I kind of wanted a KitchenAid …
    By Jessica Roy
  15. can u not
    Trump Says Wearing a Burka Is Easier Because You Get to Skip Putting on Makeup“Fact is, it’s easier. You don’t have to put on makeup. Look how beautiful everyone looks.”
    By Jessica Roy
  16. can u not
    Least-Useful Avenger Says It’s ‘Not My Job’ to Help Actresses Get Equal PayLuckily, the women of Hollywood don’t need his help.
    By Jessica Roy
  17. What Kind of Monster Would Buy These Incredibly Lifelike Cat Purses?I’m freaked out.
    By Jessica Roy
  18. can u not
    Ben Carson Tries to Top Himself, Blames Holocaust on Gun ControlIt’s a popular theory, though it’s been repeatedly debunked.
    By Jonah Shepp
  19. video
    Anti-Sexism Ad Yanked for Being SexistOops.
    By Jessica Roy
  20. state politics
    State Rep. Involved in Weird Scandal ResignsThe fake scandal failed to save Michigan State representative Todd Courser’s job. 
    By Jaime Fuller
  21. can u not
    Don’t Ask Serena Williams Why She’s Not Smiling“To be perfectly honest I don’t want to be here.”
    By Jessica Roy
  22. crimes and misdemeanors
    Couple Arrested for Taking Selfies on Boat Already Occupied by Sleeping FamilyThey left behind a bag of still-warm food from a KFC/Taco Bell. 
    By Jaime Fuller
  23. can u not
    How Not to Message a Woman OnlineA case study.
    By Jessica Roy
  24. 2016
    Deez Nuts Sparks Fake-Candidate EpidemicThere are multiple Joe Bidens now running for president. 
    By Jaime Fuller
  25. can u not
    How I Attain Perfection Without Even TryingA young, beautiful celebrity lets us in on her secret regimen for attaining perfection. Hint: It’s nothing.
    By Jessica Roy and Allison P. Davis
  26. can u not
    Cheating Allegations Hit Little League Softball World Series Really?
    By Jaime Fuller
  27. can u not
    Is There Any Right Way to Reject a Guy? [Updated]Sadly, there is no Harry Potter spell that casts away manbabies.
    By Jessica Roy
  28. crimes and misdemeanors
    Police Very Confused by People Sneaking Into Stinky SewerThe men were reportedly on a treasure hunt.
    By Jaime Fuller
  29. video
    Grown Man Throws On-Air Tantrum Over the Kardashians“I’m having a good Friday, so I refuse to talk about the Kardashians today.”
    By Jessica Roy
  30. can u not
    Michigan State Rep. Says He Was BlackmailedTodd Courser plans to stay in government so he can expose “political shenanigans.”
    By Jaime Fuller
  31. State Representative Tries to Hide Affair by Spreading Rumors About HimselfHow to completely fail at hiding a scandal. 
    By Jaime Fuller
  32. can u not
    Kelly Osbourne Was Reminded That Ironic Racism Is Still RacistShe was aiming for Daily Show but landed closer to Tosh.0.
    By Jessica Roy
  33. can u not
    FBI Arrests North Carolina Men Allegedly Prepping for U.S. to Impose Martial LawOne of the three accused men was preparing homemade explosives called “game changers,” for the post-Jade Helm United States.
    By Jaime Fuller
  34. can u not
    Man Realizes Petting Cougars Was ‘Bad Decision’“They wanted me to pet them.”
    By Jaime Fuller
  35. crimes and misdemeanors
    Pennsylvania Mailman Charged With Delivering Other People’s Mail to HimselfFederal authorities had doubts that all 22,000 pieces of mail were addressed to him. 
    By Jaime Fuller
  36. can u not
    Teen Arrested After Allegedly Stealing $30 From Lemonade StandThis is the second lemonade-stand robbery reported this month.
    By Jaime Fuller
  37. can u not
    Woman Finds New Thing to Blame Obama ForA woman arrested for counterfeiting money in Tennessee tells police that the president told her to do it.
    By Jaime Fuller
  38. seaworld
    PETA Thinks Gung-Ho Animal Activist Was Maybe Just Undercover SeaWorld Employee“Grab your pitch forks and torches. Time to take down SeaWorld.”
    By Jaime Fuller
  39. Sheriff Joe Arpaio Gets Tough on Horse Sex“These animals are not meant to be sex toys for the perverted,” says Joe Arpaio.
    By Jaime Fuller
  40. NYPD Fails to Notice Guy With Selfie Stick on Top of Brooklyn Bridge“I don’t recommend anybody else do it. It’s not a smart thing to do because I know they take security on the bridges seriously.”
    By Jaime Fuller
  41. can u not
    Everybody, Give Attention to These Men for Doing Things Women Do Every DayHere’s that participation trophy you clearly want so badly.
    By Jessica Roy
  42. Man Who Threatened to Join ISIS Wants Cat BackHe just wanted his cat back. 
    By Jaime Fuller
  43. can u not
    Male Psychiatrist Discovers New Mental Illness: Dowdiness“I raised the obvious: Had she considered getting a makeover?”
    By Jessica Roy
  44. can u not
    Meanwhile, on the Upper West Side: ‘Dog Racism’“It’s like dog racism essentially.”
    By Jessica Roy
  45. can u not
    Austin Government Pays Man to Explain WomenJonathan K. Allen offered helpful advice, such as numbers confuse the ladies and ugh they talk nonstop.
    By Jessica Roy
  46. can u not
    Okay, Which One of You Left 800 Used Adult Diapers on the Side of the Road?You really need to stop doing it.
    By Jessica Roy
  47. can u not
    How Do You Spot a Male Feminist? He’ll Tell YouPlease join me in a resounding “nope” for the Male Feminists of New York Calendar.
    By Jessica Roy
  48. can u not
    Men Now Scheduling Vasectomies As Excuse to Stay Home and Watch March Madness“It seemed like a great combination because you’re supposed to be on the couch for a few days.”
    By Jessica Roy
  49. can u not
    Mountain Lion Literally Can’t EvenHappy Friday!
    By Jessica Roy
  50. ‘Looking for a GF’ Flyer Guy Laid 118 TimesHis old-school dating campaign has apparently been wildly successful.
    By Jessica Roy
Load More