The Summer Is Getting REALLY Sticky and Unpleasant for Dick FuldThe Lehmann Brothers CEO says he’s “disappointed” by losses as rumors of the firm’s demise intensify, ‘Bazaar’ editor Glenda Bailey becomes a dame, and Britney’s NYC apartment goes on the market in today’s roundup of news from the realms of finance, media, real estate, and law.
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Richard Branson to Kick Off Virgin Hotel Chain in New York?Bajillionaire Branson may be spending more time in Manhattan. Meanwhile, Cablevision lawyer Harvey L. Beneson mortgages his Hamptons house to pay off his lawsuit, UBS clients run scared as a federal investigation warms up, and another magazine catering to the rich appears on the horizon, in today’s roundup of news from the worlds of real estate, law, finance, and media.
Ana Marie Cox Comes Full Circle at ‘Radar’The founding Wonkette editor signs on to do irreverent political coverage for Maer’s magazine, another Charles Kushner associate goes down, and Andrew Cuomo noses around Dick Grasso’s package, in our daily roundup of news from the worlds of media, real estate, law, and finance.
Bankers to Paulson: You’re Kidding, Right? (Updated)Wall Streeters hope that Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson’s plan for overhauling the U.S. financial system is an April Fools’ joke, Goldman head Lloyd Blankfein buys his maid a nice apartment, and someone has a birthday in our roundup of finance, law, media, and real-estate news.
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Buyout Exodus at ‘Newsweek’A dating blogger seeks a book deal, trading desks think recession, and Jean Nouvel wins the Pritzker in our daily roundup of media, finance, law, and real-estate news.
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The Fall of Bear Stearns: A Quickie GuideThe Wall Street Journal today has a big story walking us through the events leading up to the collapse of Bear Stearns this past week. But perhaps you haven’t gotten to it yet. It’s so large and inky, and you’ve been busy, going to meetings and calculating your annual income should you become a high-class hooker. Still, you don’t want to look like an idiot, should someone, somewhere, bring up What Happened at Bear Stearns. You will want to nod knowledgably and pontificate on how it Might Affect the Economy. Which is why, using handy bullet points, we’ve summarized how the bank’s dalliance with subprime lending, coupled with a dope-smoking CEO, finally caught up with them in a stunning week-or-so period. To keep things in perspective, we started at the beginning. The very beginning.
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Lehman to World: ‘And I Am Telling You I’m Not Going’
After this weekend’s deal to sell collapsing investment bank Bear Stearns to JPMorgan, market watchers were frantically scanning the horizon to see which financial firm might be next. The name on everybody’s lips turned out to be Lehman Brothers. The bank, whose profile is similar to that of Bear Stearns, was a major player in the subprime-mortgage market as of last summer, and its shares have tumbled from $82 then to $31.75 last night. It’s also the smallest of the most important Wall Street power firms. But Lehman CEO Richard Fuld aggressively made it clear yesterday that if there is in fact a domino effect among the firms, it won’t be his company that will be tumbled first. Why?
• Because Lehman learned a ton from a similar crisis in 1998, after a panic over Russian debt, and returned stronger.
• As a result, they have a much higher level of liquidity this time around. Like, $35 billion in cash and liquid assets, on top of $160 billion in “unencumbered” assets, so it can borrow more.
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Jimmy Cayne and Richard Fuld Disinvited From the Billionaire PartyHow humiliating is it to be dropped off Forbes’ annual list of the world’s billionaires? Just ask Jimmy Cayne and Lehman Brothers’ Richard Fuld. Cayne, who stepped down from Bear Stearns earlier this year, and Fuld, who it was just announced raked in a paltry $40 million in 2007, were notably absent from this year’s list, which was released yesterday. Does this mean they will be turned away from Steve Schwarzman’s next birthday party? Will it be like, I’m sorry, sirs. Only billionaires are allowed here? If that’s the case, it’s going to be a pretty small crowd, unless Schwarzie plans to hold his fiesta in Moscow. This year, the Russian capital eclipsed New York in the amount of billionaires per capita: We have only 71, with an average net worth of $3.3 billion each, whereas in Russia, 74 billionaires, with an average net worth of $5.9 billion each, are whooping it up with the caviar blini. So other than deadbeats Fuld and Cayne, who else is keeping us down?
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Lawyers Advocate an Oscar for ‘Michael Clayton’ — That George Clooney Makes Them Look So Good!LEGAL
• Lawyers everywhere are crossing their fingers for a Michael Clayton Oscar win. “In 80 years, only 10 legal movies or actors playing members of the legal community have taken home gold,” a columnist sighs. Awwwwww. Wait a second. We didn’t do the math, but isn’t that more than like, every other profession? How many people playing bloggers have won Oscars, for instance? Slickster lawyers. Always trying to trick us with their fancy talk. [Law.com]
• Could John Edwards be our next attorney general? [The American]
• The Sean Bell “50-shot” case is set to go to trial on Monday. [NYT]
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William Kristol Has the Gray Lady’s Knickers in a TwistMEDIA
• Both Times public editor Clark Hoyt and former Times conservative standby William Safire have panned Arthur “Pinch” Sulzberger’s decision to foist William Kristol on the editorial page. Among the other conservatives considered and passed over: Charles Krauthammer, Ross Douthat, Max Boot, and a bunch of other Weekly Standard stalwarts. But at least Judith Miller approves: “[I]t’s an appointment that’s a long time coming. The page needed balance.… [But] an unabashed neocon without remorse is unacceptable to Times people.… He’s not kosher in that sense.” [New Republic]
• New York Observer president Robert Sommer nailed his MSNBC interview: “We like to view our readers as some of the smartest, most insensitive — most… Some of the most brightest readers in the country and especially New York.” [NYO]
• David Blum goes through his fifth sex columnist in little more than a year, firing his latest hire at the New York Press after she stole questions from Dan Savage. Some might call that slutty! [NYO]
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Steve Schwarzman, Jamie Dimon, and Dick Fuld’s Elephant Dance ContinuesYesterday, we told you we’d read in the Post that Blackstone CEO Steve Schwarzman went to visit J.P. Morgan CEO Jamie Dimon and Lehman CEO Dick Fuld, so that he could forgive them in person for having pulled the plug on financing for his PHH deal. But it turns out that maybe that was a total lie? “A person familiar with the matter says no such meetings took place, and that Schwarzman was, in fact, out of town when the meetings were supposed to have taken place,” the WSJ DealBlog reported today. However! The Journal does back up the Post source’s statement that Schwarzman didn’t want to be in a “pissing contest” with the banks, although their source used a different, though still penile, metaphor. “This person did say that Schwarzman decided a sword fight with the banks is of little value, and that it is hard to fault the banks for the stand they took.” Emphasis ours!
Related: Steve Schwarzman Is Friends With Jamie Dimon and Dick Fuld Again
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Imus Sucker Punches BrokawMEDIA
• Don Imus on Tom Brokaw: “He is not the most courageous person I’ve ever met in my life. He’s not the guy I’d want to be in a foxhole with.” You see, Brokaw didn’t defend Imus when he was down-and-out because of the whole “nappy-headed-hos” incident. Resentment, now that takes courage! [NYP]
• Shocker: CNBC is actually scared shitless of Fox Business News. They’re now asking guests to choose sides, threatening to drop them if they dare to appear on Murdoch’s new down-home network. [Silicon Alley Insider]
• Veteran literary agent Lynn Nesbit wants a new publishing madman: “Even [former Simon & Schuster CEO] Dick Synder is a lot more colorful than [newly departed Simon & Schuster CEO] Jack Romanos, who is now gone. I mean, they had passion, they cared about literature. Even Dick, who’s not an intellectual. He cared. He was a madman … . Who is a madman now in publishing? … It was just different then.” Hi, Lynn, allow us to introduce you to our favorite publishing madwoman, Judith Regan. [Media Mob/NYO]
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Merry Christmas, Richard Fuld!It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas! The Wall Street Journal reports that, according to a regulatory filing, Lehman CEO and chairman Richard Fuld, possessor of what is probably the most villainous face on Wall Street, received a nice little present this year: a stock grant valued at $35 million. This is way up from the $10 mil he made last year, basically because Lehman’s losses from underwriting of mortgage-backed bonds were not as bad as analysts expected. You’d think he’d at least smile.
Lehman CEO Recieves Stock Grant of $35 Million [WSJ]
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Will Dick Parsons Pull a Bloomberg?MEDIA
• Rumor has it that Richard Parson’s will announce his departure at Time Warner as early as this week. Jeff Bewkes, longtime No. 2, is set to take over as CEO. Does this mean a Parsons run for mayor? [Times of London]
• Radar cooked up a clever quiz: Fox News anchor or porn star? You decide. Wait, no, Murdoch decides. [Radar]
• Jim Cramer matched Rupert Murdoch’s legendary subtlety: “We have a competitor now in Fox and it is really important to destroy and mutilate them.” [Broadcasting & Cable]
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Jeb’s JobFINANCE
• Lehman landed former Florida governor Jeb Bush as an adviser. Makes you wonder which bank will get the honor of hiring W. when the “first MBA president” finally steps down. [Deal Journal/WSJ]
• Does Bank of America CEO Ken Lewis’s move to save Countrywide, the largest mortgage lender in the United States, make him a modern-day J.P. Morgan? [MarketWatch]
• John Dyment, the global head of Deutsche Bank’s hedge-fund unit, jumped ship for Shumway Capital Partners, a hedge fund based in Greenwich. [TheStreet.com]
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If You’ve Been Injured by a Man With Tuberculosis …LAW
• So the guy with the dangerous strain of tuberculosis (now quarantined in Colorado) is, naturally, a personal-injury lawyer. [Law Blog/WSJ]
• An in-house lawyer at G.E. sued the company for gender discrimination but worries she won’t find many plaintiffs to join her in a class action. [NYT]
• Though William Lerach was never indicted as part of the Millberg Weiss kickback case, he is considering leaving his own securities firm. [NYT]
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My CEO Can Beat Up Your CEOFINANCE
• Lehman CEO Dick Fuld, nicknamed the “Gorilla” on the Street, didn’t do so well when he picked a fight with another father at his son’s hockey game. [Trader Daily via DealBreaker]
• Paul Wolfowitz promotes his girlfriend at the World Bank, and his colleagues want him out. [CNNMoney]
• The world’s top earner in the financial sector: reclusive ex–Enron trader John Arnold, who netted almost $2 billion shorting natural gas. [The Guardian]
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Top Moneymaker Leaves LehmanFINANCE
• Lehman lost its top-producing banker on Friday to a sudden resignation. Was Woody Young passed over for head of the finance group? [NYT]
• Monday morning got you feeling uninspired? Ninja Stockbroker will return you to market-high glory. [Nova Cartoons via DealBreaker]
• Fresh off its blowout purchase of Equity Office, the Blackstone Group scoops up Pinnacle Foods (Duncan Hines, Vlasic) for $2.16 Billion. [AP via CBS News]