How Susan Orlean Gifts
“Give the very best thing you can think of and then don’t overthink it.”
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We asked 20 notable people about their gifting philosophies, gifting nightmares, the best gifts under $25, and so much more. We’ll be publishing each of their questionnaires now through December 23 in this new series, “How I Gift.” Today, journalist and author Susan Orlean on orchids, face masks, and the most disappointing gift she’s ever received.
What is your gift-giving philosophy?
Give the very best thing you can think of and then don’t overthink it. You can’t control how your gift will be received.
What gift have you received that you’re most surprised about still using regularly?
My son gave me a tiny knife with a folding blade. I use it almost every day for opening envelopes, cutting tags, you name it.
You have to give the same present to everyone for the rest of your life. What is it?
Flowers. I have a lifetime pass in being able to give peopleorchidsand having it seem thoughtful and meaningful. The proliferation of inexpensive orchids has removed a little bit of the drama of giving someone one, but I still think they’re really nice to give and kind of perfect because it’s both a flower and a plant. A pretty seasonal bouquet is also just a wonderful gift for anyone of any sort. And an abundance of one kind of flower is really fun. It feels very, very indulgent and extravagant to get somebody three bunches of tulips.
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What was the most heartfelt, smart, so “you” present you’ve ever received?
My husband bought me 20 articles of clothing from the RealReal, all from my favorite designers.
Is a gift card ever a good gift?
For kids, yes. It’s all about knowing the kid. If you know their interests, I think it’s really fun to give a card to a very specific website or store. If it’s a niece or nephew and you haven’t seen them in six weeks, their interests probably change. But unless their parent can tell you really specifically what they’re into, I think a gift card can be a way of saying “go treat yourself,” and for kids, that’s kind of fabulous.
Here’s $10 to get a gift for someone at Walgreens. What are you buying?
Cool nail polish. Ghirardelli chocolates. Face or foot mask.
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What’s the best gift under $25?
Always flowers. I used to say books, but many are now a bit over $25. Books are actually one of the more challenging gifts to give. I’m inclined to give a book that I really love, that I think they would like. If not, I would give a beautiful book. Something that’s just really fun to look at, if they have an interest of some sort. If you know they’re going on a trip sometime soon, it would be awesome to give them a book related to the trip. I would absolutely put in the gift receipt and say, “If you’ve already read this or it doesn’t kind of ring your bell, then swap it for something else.”
What’s the last thing you impulse bought for someone else?
Apair of socksthat look like sticks of butter, for a very close friend who is a restaurant reviewer and cookbook author. Butter is part of her life, but also we have a funny anecdote that relates to being called Butter, so when I saw them, I thought,Oh my God, she has to have these. My favorite gifts to give are gifts that are not related to an occasion. If I see something that a friend of mine will get a kick out of, I buy it. And increasingly that’s the way I like to give gifts. This is a friend who I exchange birthday gifts with, so when I saw this, I thought,Oh, I’ll save it for her birthday. And then I thought,You know what? I don’t want to save it for her birthday. I want to send it now. I want her to have the fun of having it now.
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How can all bad gift givers get better? In five words or less.
Buy ahead. Wrap nicely.
What’s the (physically) largest gift you’ve ever given?
A car, to my son. A Toyota FJ Cruiser in steel gray.
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Toyota FJ Cruiser Trail Teams Special Edition
And the smallest?
Tiny stud earrings, to a friend. I got them atCarol Young Undesigned.
What’s the most jealous you’ve ever been of a present someone else got?My friend Christy’s husband tracked down a pair of Birkenstocks — the ones from thatManolo Blahnik collab— for her. Besides the fact that they were gorgeous, I was blown away by how much effort he’d made for her.
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What is your dream gift? Is there any chance you actually get it?
My dream gift is a donkey. I feel like it’s an obvious good gift. Maybe not everybody feels that way, but my husband, who is a great gift giver, knew that I really wanted a donkey, and I received a donkey IOU from him a few years ago for my birthday. At that time, we were living on a farm in Hudson Valley, so it wasn’t as nutty an idea as it sounds. I just thought it was the most amazing gift.
One wrinkle is that donkeys live for a really long time, like 40 years. And so the thought of the commitment to a 40-year relationship with a donkey got me very nervous. I kept putting it off. Then we moved to L.A., and it’s not an ideal place for a donkey. So it remains a “to be fulfilled” gift.
What was the most disappointing gift you’ve ever received? How did you respond?
A man I was involved with — I thought — gave me, for my birthday, a Chia pet shaped like a woman’s head. The head would grow Chia hair once you watered it. It broke my heart. Giving someone an ugly female head made of clay that grows weird icky sprouts on it is never a good gift.
It’s tricky when it’s a romantic thing. One of the things you want is to convey some idealized sense of the person, whether it’s beauty or intelligence. I mean, evidently, something about me conveyed “Chia pet,” which is concerning to me. I think the real secret in giving a gift to a new romantic partner is to make them feel like you see them, you know who they are, and you like who they are.
In the early stages of a relationship, giving functional gifts is never romantic. I have a friend who gave a woman he was dating a sauté pan. He was very puzzled because she was unhappy. I was puzzled that he couldn’t understand why it was such a horrible gift. He kept saying to me, “But I think she needed it.” And I said, well, that’s not the point.
Is it ever okay to regift?
Absolutely! I think most gifts are meant to be circulated and recirculated endlessly and never used.
What’s the best gift wrap?
Newspapers in a foreign language. Or Tyvek “No Trespassing” signs.
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More Christmas Gift Ideas
- The Best Gifts for 2-Year-Olds
- The Best Gifts for 1-Year-Olds
- The Best Father’s Day Gifts for Outdoorsy Dads, According to Outdoorsy Dads
- The Best Gifts for Outdoorsy Dads, According to Outdoorsy Dads
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