How John Derian Gifts
“Gift giving is a combination of — you want it to be something that you love, but you also have to keep the person in mind.”
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We asked 20 notable people about their gifting philosophies, gifting nightmares, the best gifts under $25, and much more. We’ll be publishing each of their questionnaires now through December 23 in this new series, “How I Gift.” Today, designer John Derian on passport holders, Silly Putty, and his best gift-giving advice.
What is your gift-giving philosophy?
It is funny, because obviously I have a store, and for 30 years I’ve watched people make decisions. Gift giving is a combination of — you want it to be something that you love, but you also have to keep the person in mind. So, how do you balance that? Just talk about that to the salesperson and see what they say.
What gift have you received that you’re most surprised about still using regularly?
My friend Corinne has a shop in Marrakech — she gave me this passport holder that has a divider in the center. It’sfaux— maybe alligator or something. I’m just not a leather-goods person or ever had a holder for my passport and never thought it made sense, but I love it. I was like,Huh, what do I do with this?And then I do use it when I travel all the time.
You have to give the same present to everyone for the rest of your life. What is it?
Aceramic watermelonbyPenkridge. Our ceramic fruits are done by these two women in England, and they’ve been making this stuff for 40 years. I got all their watermelons that they had made, all kinds of varieties, and we have them in a giant thing next door. Right now I have two in my apartment. Everyone that I give it to thinks it’s the coolest thing. Friends that have one here and one there, one in the kitchen … I remember the first time when I first got one; I was having friends over for Thanksgiving and my friend was like, “I can’t believe you left a label on this watermelon,” and they started peeling it off and I was like, “It’s not real.”
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What was the most heartfelt, smart, so-you present you’ve ever received?
For my 50th, my partner, Stephen, made me an illustrated book of what he loved about me and drew scenes from our time together, and it was very sweet. I got a little teary. And then my friends, at the same time, gave me a pair of rain boots, which I loved, and I had to go upstairs and cry. I feel like I grew up burned by my family so much that I’m just like,Don’t give me gifts, don’t give me gifts. When he gave it to me, I was like, “Don’t give me anything ever again, you never have to give me another gift, this is the best gift I’ve ever received.”
Advent calendars: great or dumb?
I never had one, but my publisher’s been trying to get me to make one for the last ten years.
Here’s $10 to get a gift for someone at Walgreens. What are you buying?
A gag gift, or any kind of toy that’s there — you might even find Silly Putty, or something charming and funny. Or you could just give something like nail-polish remover to a man.
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What’s the best gift under $25?
Olive oil. I have a basic olive oil that I use, and I know there are finer ones, but just for regular cooking, I likeFrantoiaextra-virgin olive oil.
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What’s the last thing you impulse bought for someone else?
ABananagrams x MZ Wallace bag. There’s four of us that play a lot, usually at the beach and stuff, and then when I saw this bag, I just thought it would be a funny holiday gift to give them. They thought it was really thoughtful, so it was kind of fun. My friend was like, “I’m going to use the bag to carry things around in,” because it’s shaped like the Bananagrams pouch and actually has the tiles inside. The shoulder bag with a banana sack was just a funny thing too.
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Who is the best gift giver you’ve ever encountered?
My friend Joanne Rossman. She finds mostly antique things, and I feel like she has some kind of emotional connection to it. There’s some kind of mystery involved or something. Last year she gave me these two little figures in a square box that didn’t have a back, they just kind of floated. It just sits in my house now, and I totally get it. I feel like things speak to her and I think sometimes things speak to me, so when she gets something that speaks to her, somehow it comes to me and I’m like,Okay, I love it.
What was your absolute worst gifting experience (giving or getting)?
I was a creative person in a big family growing up, and so it wasn’t like anyone really understood me. Even though I was one of six, I didn’t necessarily spend that much time with my siblings. When Christmas would come, no one ever knew what to give me. There was a time when suddenly I liked natural fibers, because it was the ’70s and everything was polyester, and so my mom would be so happy that she got me a sweater that had 10 percent cotton, and it was 90 percent polyester. She’s like, “See, I got you cotton,” and I was like, “Oh yeah, thanks.” I lived in houses with a bunch of roommates, so I’d just go home and dump my gifts out, and they’d all be totally fine and happy to take whatever they wanted. It was fine, that’s how it was.
And then my brother … I would go all out with all their kids because I had 19 kids to buy things for all the time. One year my brother, who has four kids, sent me a box of popcorn as a gift, and I was like,So I do all this stuff, and I spend all this time and then energy and trying to find the right gifts for you and all your kids, and then you send me a box of popcorn?That was one of the worst things I ever got. It seemed like why send it to me? I tell this story to other people, and people are like, “Oh, I love popcorn.” And I love popcorn, too, but it just seems like not the most thoughtful gift.
How can all bad gift givers get better? In five words or less.
Imagine getting the gift yourself.
You just got someone you have truly never met for Secret Santa. What are you buying them?
Fake poop — a big one, not cat size. At the Balloon Saloon, two years ago, I got a giant poop, and I brought it to my friend Emily’s birthday. It was a group of us, we go every July 1, and I stuck it in the bathroom as a joke. Then she came out of the bathroom, kind of white, and she was like, “I don’t think my dad will like that.” So, we just took it away.
We have a house in Provincetown, and we have a stoop that we sit on, so we just put the poop on the sidewalk to watch people pass by, and it is, across the board, the funniest thing. You can’t even imagine. Even if no one clocks it, they still step over it, or a car will run over it, or somebody might kick it, or somebody might be drunk and trip on it, or … It’s kind of never ending.
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What’s the (physically) largest gift you’ve ever received?
A Volkswagen Beetle from Stephen. We both love it. And he loves it more than he imagined because anything you do in it is fun. There’s something about a Beetle that makes people smile.
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1960 Volkswagen Beetle
What was the most disappointing gift you’ve ever received? How did you respond?
A large karaoke machine. I was blown away by getting a giant gift from my friends that I didn’t like. They all talked about it, and pitched in, and got it, and I was like “no.” I’d only karaoke’d a couple times, and it was so obviously thoughtful because they noticed that I was into it, but I didn’t even have a TV at the time. I just said, “Thank you, but no thank you, it’s too big.” I just wanted to be honest. Instead, I got the smallest, cutest little TV that’s probably the size of a laptop that had the best picture. I would keep it in a closet and pull it out every once in a while. Anyway, then I thanked them all for the TV.
[Editor’s note: A correction has been made to this post on December 2, 2025.]
More Christmas Gift Ideas
- The Best Gifts for 2-Year-Olds
- The Best Gifts for 1-Year-Olds
- The Best Father’s Day Gifts for Outdoorsy Dads, According to Outdoorsy Dads
- The Best Gifts for Outdoorsy Dads, According to Outdoorsy Dads
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