If you’ve spent any time looking for women’s Halloween costumes, you’ve probably noticed that most are needlessly “sexy,” with aggressively shortened hems and deeply cut necklines, even if the costume doesn’t necessarily call for it. We don’t have anything against sexy costumes at all, but does a paratrooper or Queen of Hearts really need to be that extra? Maybe you’re going to a kid-friendly Halloween party! Maybe you don’t want to feel cold and cinched while having a good time. Or maybe you’re just tired. No matter the reason, we found 13 of the least-sexy Halloween costumes for women on Amazon. They’re not unsexy, mind you — they just allow you to be as sexy as you want to be.
It’s about as modest as you can possibly get — broom not included.
A frilly, chaste, Good Witch fantasy.
Why be a “sexy” nurse in stilettos when you could be Clara Barton, the woman who founded the Red Cross?
The ultimate cute and comfortable Halloween costume has to be a kigurumi, or oversize onesies that are designed to look like animals. If this kangaroo isn’t your style, you could try out a penguin or a unicorn onesie instead.
Signature side buns are included in this classic, all-white Princess Leia costume. Lose the belt and really let loose.
Throw this bee costume over the all-black outfit of your choice, and just like that, your Halloween costume is as comfortable as you want to be.
Channel Sally Ride with an astronaut jumpsuit that won’t cause you to worry about hemlines riding up.
Speaking of jumpsuits, this Ghostbusters costume comes with an inflatable proton backpack to trap the patriarchy.
This long-sleeved, floor-length dress with a hood is ideal for the modest yet spooky corpse bride you want to be.
Dressing like Wonder Woman can be as simple as putting on a T-shirt. A little lazy, but points for comfort.
For something of a kindergarten-schoolteacher vibe.
You can wear a nice blouse underneath if you don’t want to expose your arms in this toga costume.