How Kate Berlant Gifts
“I gravitate toward stationery stores when I’m looking for little gifts.”
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We asked 20 notable people about their gifting philosophies, gifting nightmares, the best gifts under $25, and much more. We’ll be publishing each of their questionnaires now through December 23 in this new series, “How I Gift.” Today, comedian and actress Kate Berlant on Swedish soap, Japanese pocket knives, and the best gift she’s ever received.
What gift have you received that you’re most surprised about still using regularly?
ChenKitchen scissorsthat were given to me by Claudia O’Doherty, the Australian comedic actress.
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What was the most heartfelt, smart, so you present you’ve ever received? Tell us the story.
My high-school best friend, genius writer Samy Burch, gifted me for my 16th birthday one of the prop frogs that falls from the sky inMagnolia. It even came with an authentication certificate that it was used in the film. That movie is really important to me and our friendship and I’ll never get over it.
Is a gift card ever a good gift? Discuss.
Honestly? Yes. It’s absolutely impersonal and absolutely appreciated. I appreciate the honesty of saying, “I don’t know what to give you.” But make it a gift card to a store where you would physically want to go have an experience — like I was given a gift card to my favorite specialty food store,Cookbook, here in Los Angeles, and I really appreciated that. Although I still am haunted by the time I gave a gift card to a kitchen store to someone as a wedding present only to realize that they no longer lived in the same city as that store.
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Cookbook Gift Card
Advent calendars: great or dumb? Defend your position.
An ancient art that has tragically fallen away. I got advent calendars as a child, and popping open the little paper door to find something is a core memory (it doesn’t matter what is behind the door, advent calendars are a psychological experiment in delaying pleasure).
Would you ever just give cash? When? How much?
Cash is acceptable for teenagers. When I was 14, my dad’s friend gave me a $50 bill in a red envelope, and I thought that was really cool. I think cash could only be for someone for whom having printed money feels like an exotic object.
Here’s $10 to get a gift for someone at Walgreens. What are you buying?
Two minis of Bioderma micellar water.
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What’s the best gift under $25?
I’ve been gifting a lot of thisSwedish Dream sea-salt soaplately. The packaging is one of those familiar, but forgotten things where when you see it, you’re like,Oh yeah, that thing.To me, the clean smell is sublime. It has pieces of rock salt embedded in it that act as an exfoliation agent. And it’s just nine bucks.
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What’s the last thing you impulse bought for someone else?
I bought a vintage white fabric tie for my sweetheart that I found in NYC. I can’t reveal where because I’m hesitant to give away my favorite little vintage stores. But they do well. It’s not like I’m withholding business from them.
Who is the best gift-giver you’ve ever encountered — and why?
I have to say my mother. It’s not what is inside the gift. It’s the gift itself, the wrapping. She worked in prop design and set design, so she is a fabricator by trade and has the hand and eye of an artist. The wrapping paper is perfectly flush to the box, and there’s no visible tape. They’re also really playful; lots of ribbon, lots of shine, great colors. It’s so astonishingly beautiful that whatever could possibly be inside is besides the point. I hate using words like joyful, but they’re joyful. Her gifts are sculptures.
My mom’s wrapping is so beautiful that as a child I once refused to open a few presents from her. They remained fully wrapped in our living room for — and I promise I’m not exaggerating — years. Time passed and as a teenager I had a party when my parents were out of town. A friend’s boyfriend unwrapped a couple of them — can you imagine the violation?
What was your absolute worst gifting experience (giving or getting)?
Opening a present is almost always a nightmare, but I have my act down. (Widen the eyes, shake the head!)
How can all bad gift-givers get better? In five words or fewer.
Don’t make it about you.
You can pick any five people (dead or alive) to join your game of White Elephant. Who are you choosing?
Megan Mullally, Amy Sedaris, John Early, Luchita Hurtado, Santa. Megan is a dear friend of mine and a beautiful gift-giver with an incredible eye for design. Amy Sedaris is like a patron saint of gift-giving and wrapping and all of that. I had lunch with her not too long ago, and she brought me a little bag with a beautiful face mask, nice hand lotion, and some socks and stickers inside. John Early gives great books. He does something smart, which maybe this is blowing up his spot, but he’ll find a book he loves and just buy 20 of them from a local bookstore. Luchita Hurtado was such an amazing artist, but she also made her own clothes and I think she would have given beautifully handmade, spectacular gifts. And Santa, just because I’m like,What is his taste in gifts? Which gift would he take?
You just got someone you have truly never met for Secret Santa. What are you buying them?
A nice pocket knife. I was at a stationery store recently and they had theselittle Higonokami Japanese pocket knivesand I was like,Well what’s that going to run you, $75?But then it was only 30 bucks. And I thought that would be a nice gift. Just in general, I gravitate toward stationery stores when I’m looking for little gifts like this. I likeChoosing Keepingin London andHigh Tide in downtown L.A. And of course, John Derian, which is like a Christmas dream to me.
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What’s the (physically) largest gift you’ve ever given?
A my-size Barbie doll as a child.
And the smallest?
A small carved walnut I got at John Derian.
What’s the most jealous you’ve ever been of a present someone else got?
I never saw this happen, but the idea of getting a golden-retriever puppy on Christmas morning makes me jealous. It’s the only thing that can combat the abject depression of Christmas being over.
What is your dream gift? Is there any chance you actually get it?
I’m aware that no purchase or vacation can lift us into a new dimension or personality, however I am convinced that a couple nights on the Belmond train (perhaps London to Venice?) would transform my relationship not only to God but to literature. I’ve seen the unbearably beautiful cabins and Champagne dinners. I’d do anything — except pay!
More Christmas Gift Ideas
- The Best Gifts for 2-Year-Olds
- The Best Gifts for 1-Year-Olds
- The Best Father’s Day Gifts for Outdoorsy Dads, According to Outdoorsy Dads
- The Best Gifts for Outdoorsy Dads, According to Outdoorsy Dads
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