Spencer’s Is Actually a Really Good Place to Shop for Sex Toys
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As a high-schooler, there was a formula to the group mall hangout: grabbing free samples at the Auntie Anne’s, scanning the darkness of Hollister despite having only the $1.50 we needed to take the bus afterward, and of course, “happening” upon Spencer’s, whispering and giggling as we’d rush single-file to the back of the store.
While at the time, the back wall of sex toys and gadgets incited flushed faces and bouts of laughter, a few years later, it became the vehicle for the awkward beginning of my sexual-wellness journey. It was at the Spencer’s in Jersey City’s Newport mall that I bought my first bullet and eventually came back for something “a little more” (and by “little,” I mean the giant flesh-colored dildo that’s suctioned to the inside of my drawer). You may have not thought about Spencer’s in a while, assumed it closed down years ago, or cast it off after high school as the crude sex shop in the dark corner of the mall, but it’s quite the opposite. Not only does the 80-year-old retailer remain in 600 stores across the country, it has also expanded from a novelty and gag-gift shop to a serious contender in the sex-wellness game. This year, the brand traveled across different college campuses, educating students on sexual health. It remains the only retail chain “sex shop” that you can actually find in malls.
Being a sex and relationships writer who now owns more sex toys than I could ever possibly use (trust me, I’ve tried), I haven’t actually bought a sex toy or even perused a sex shop in quite some time. But I decided to go back to my — or rather, our — roots and see how the taboo gag shop survived all these years.
Not much has changed for the front-of-shop at Spencer’s. I walked past some politically incorrect T-shirts, weed-themed merch, and an almost alarming amount of penis- and boob-shaped trinkets clearly catered to those hosting an early-2000s-esque bachelorette party. But the back of the store was no longer a “salacious” wall of gag gifts: It was a clear indication that Spencer’s knows sex — and really well, too.
The store carries almost everything and anything you might want in your sex-toy chest:lubes,vibrators,butt plugs, floggers, handcuffs, dildos, and more. And these aren’t gag gifts like the inventory in the front — Spencer’s actually carries great offerings from some of my favorite sexual-wellness brands.
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In the “sex world,” we’re often told that two things are key to a great sex life: communication and lube. Lube Life is one of those brands that has figured out how to make lube in 25 different ways. And while I’ll admit my lube collection is quite expansive, I do have a favorite: the water-based lubricant. This lube lasts, doesn’t feel super sticky, and is great for any solo, partner, or toy play you need.
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A proper sex-toy collection includes more than just toys. Hottlove doesn’t get enough credit for its super-cheap and actually effective collection of sex oils. This Warming Massage Oil actuallydoeswhat it says it’s going to: warm against your skin as you rub it in. And because we all believe in foreplay here, this is just what you need to get things started.
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In the world of sex toys, the bullet is your kitten heel: a tried-and-true staple that always gets the job done and is definitely the way to go for beginners. It’s small, effective, and (despite what you may see on social media) ridiculously better than “the Rose.” While the bullet is one of the simplest sex toys you could get, Sexology offers options that have up to ten different vibration functions. It’s waterproof, super small, and so easy to pack whenever you need to just “bang one out.”
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While the updatedChorus Pro— my new favorite toy — has yet to hit Spencer’s shelves, I was pleasantly surprised to see We-Vibe at Spencer’s, as it’s one of my favorite sex-tech brands. The Chorus is so much fun to use with a partner, and I love that I can control it with an app. It’s definitely a slightly more advanced toy because it offers both clitoral and G-spot stimulation, which can feel like a lot for first-timers. But unlike its competitors, it actually bends to fit your vagina so that you’re not stuck trying to jam something inside of you that clearly wasn’t made for your body.
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If you’re serious about getting into anal play, you’re going to need more than just lube. The Romp Luster Anal Training Kit was the first set of butt plugs I ever tried, and it really does help that the kit gives you options in graduated sizes (I’m still on the second one). Also, plenty of other butt plugs that I’ve tried since feel very much like rubber, making it necessary to constantly reapply lube. But the Luster kit’s silicone material really does feel silky smooth and easier to glide into place. They’re simple and pretty intuitive, and I just really like that when you use them, there’s a cute little flower or heart sticking out of your butt.
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As embarrassed as I am to admit this, my first exploration of BDSMwasin fact due to readingFifty Shades of Greymy senior year of high school. And it was this exact beginner’s kit that helped me live out my Christian Grey fantasies with my very un–Christian Grey college boyfriend (well, he was controlling, just not in a hot way). A simple blindfold, handcuffs, and paddle got me through plenty of years before I upgraded to nipple clamps, flogs, and Shibari. But these handcuffs still sit on my bed frame ready for action at all times.
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