people's choice

The Best Bidets on Amazon, According to Hyperenthusiastic Reviewers

Photo: Courtesy of Comedy Central.

When the pandemic first hit, toilet paper flew off the shelves, inspiring many people to buy a bidet. And while you can find toilet paper much easier now, bidets are still a good idea. They basically eliminate the need for toilet paper altogether, which is much more environmentally friendly in the long run, and, according to fans of bidets, more sanitary. And there are lots of enthusiastic bidet owners sharing their thoughts in Amazon reviews, so we’ve read through hundreds of their comments to find the best bidets. Once you’re done shopping for a bidet, we have a few more eco-friendly things for you, like natural cleaning products, dishcloths, sustainable kitchen tools, and reusable straws.

Related Articles: Toto Bidet Review

Best-rated bidet

Luxe Bidet Neo 120

“Speaking as a hirsute gentleman, the Luxe Bidet Neo 120 has soured me on pooping in bidet-less toilets forever,” one reviewer writes. “It’s shown me the difference between rubbing peanut butter out of shag carpeting with a paper towel, and that sparkling clean feeling you get right when you step out of the shower.” And more than 6,500 five-star reviewers sing the praises of this bidet. “The easy-to-control flow valve allows you to provide just the right amount of water pressure for a full range of cleaning, from ‘gentle trickling stream’ to ‘full-on ‘Silkwood’ decontamination,’ ensuring the end of your bowel movement leaves you feeling cleaner and more refreshed than using just toilet paper alone,” one reviewer writes. Thousands of reviewers say that this bidet significantly reduces their need for toilet paper. “Besides the fact that TP is EXPENSIVE, I was concerned about the accumulation in my tank,” one reviewer with a septic tank writes. They continue, “This bidet cleans well enough that I’m using about 1/4 to 1/3 the amount of paper I previously used.” As one clean customer says, “The smug sense of superiority I now have over using fewer TP sheets can only be rivaled by the adorable squeaking sounds I make with every step.”

Best-rated (less expensive) bidet

Brondell GoSpa Travel Bidet

This is much different than the other bidets listed, but if you’re completely uninterested in installing anything onto your toilet, this Brondell travel bidet might be a good option. “It’s small enough to carry in a bag when traveling or to tuck under a cabinet for regular use at home,” writes one reviewer, and others have taken this portable bidet far and wide. One who regularly travels to a remote location in Central America where toilet paper can’t be flushed says, “My husband and I simply cannot travel without.” Another outdoorsy user says they “purchased before our hike on the John Muir Trail and this made ‘clean up’ so much more enjoyable and it aids in using way less toilet paper.” Another appreciates the accompanying travel bag, which, “allows discreet transportation of the travel bidet to the bathroom especially when away from home.” Dozens of reviewers do point out that this is essentially just a squeeze bottle, but one explains what makes this so special: “Sure, you can use an empty squeeze bottle as a ‘poor man’s (women’s) bidet’, but the difference between this and doing that is that the nozzle on this is angled so that you can direct the stream of water at wherever you are wanting to be clean and fresh.” Another reviewer calls out the “little metal air vent thing on the bottom so you don’t have to keep letting air in to get good pressure.”

Best mechanical bidet

Astor Bidet Fresh Water Spray Non-Electric Mechanical Bidet

“Never in a million years did I think I’d write the words ‘This ups your wipe game,’ but here we are,” one bidet convert writes. More than 5,000 reviewers give this bidet five stars and many are impressed by how well it works, despite the fact that it’s not electric. The same user continues, “When researching bidets, I didn’t understand how this could work without power, but it’s simple water pressure,” which they describe as pretty intense. “Thank goodness the power is adjustable, because the lowest level is plenty.” Another user says they settled for this mechanical bidet, but they weren’t disappointed with its performance: “While I would have loved a fancier model with the hot air and the oscillating spray I needed to go with a non-electric because the tile in the bathroom was already up and changes to the electric system (or exposed wires) were out of the question. Still extremely happy with this simple model, it gets the job done.” Over a third of five-star reviewers also comment on how easy this is to install. One even jokes it’s “so easy I joke about getting an extra one to carry around with me so I never have to ‘go’ without a bidet again.”

Best bidet with hot and cold water

Luxe Bidet Neo 320

About a sixth of all five-star reviewers appreciate that hot and cold functionality of this bidet. “I suppose there are probably people who would really enjoy the equivalent of Old Faithful rushing to greet their nethers, but I’m not one to live for extremes and usually find pressing the lever down only half way quite comfortably enough,” one reviewer, who loves the hot and cold options on this bidet in their master bedroom, writes. “The cool water option is refreshing, and the hot nice and soothing. As another reviewer noted, the thought of cold water might make you cringe, but is in reality very pleasant.” And another customer says that they “cannot imaging not having that option to mix in hot water to make a very comfortable warm spray.” One reviewer describes the design as “ingenious,” adding, “The hot/cold water adjustment was perfect and the aim of this thing was ON TARGET.”

Best bidet with gender settings

Luxe Bidet Neo 185 (Elite Series)

Dozens of reviewers like this particular bidet because it has two nozzles, as well as a male and female setting, which is appreciated by mixed-gender couples. “The female setting didn’t disappoint in helping me feel fresher during my cycle,” one reviewer writes. “The wash setting is for the bootie and it pretty much eliminates the need to use toilet paper. I had no trouble centering it to hit the money spots and am glad I bought this model with both nozzles.” One couple even says, “We both laughed at the ‘aiming accuracy’ of the spray nozzle.” Two nozzles might sound like more cleaning, but one user says, “The shield also covers the nozzles completely when not in use. No backsplash or male urine has gotten anywhere near the nozzles.” Plus, it’s saving one reviewer on some other costs: “Once I’m done pooping, a couple of sprays, one wipe, and that’s it. I use 1/4 of the toilet paper that I used to, so this thing will practically pay for itself over the life of the product.”